Supernatural Saturday: Pink Fluffy Unicorns

Happy Saturday my interwebs friends!

UPDATE: This afternoon, Kissed by Darkness hit #72 in paranormal over on Amazon UK.  That’s the highest it’s ever been and I think it deserves a big fat SQUEE!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Now on to our regularly scheduled programming.)

Today I have something truly magical to share with you.  Please place all drinking beverages safely at arms length.  Ready?  Okay.

Yeah, don’t feel bad.  I nearly wet myself two.

But why unicorns?  You ask.

Well, yesterday over on author Anne-Mhairi Simpson’s blog there was a Great Debate on unicorns vs. dragons.  Dragons won.  Duh.

But that got me thinking about those little one-horned horses.  Are they really as fluffy as we tend to think?

I mean, seriously, when I think unicorn, I don’t think scary.  Or strong.  Or frightening.  I just think, FLUFFY!  I think Saturday morning cartoons, rainbows, puppies, kittens and lucky charms.

But could there be more?

So I did a little research.

Now here’s the kicker.  The mythology of unicorns originated with the Greeks.  Yet strangely, unicorns aren’t found in Greek mythology, but in rather in accounts of natural history.  In fact, up until sometime in the 19th century historians and naturalists believed unicorns were real creatures.

Now all this is quite cool, but it doesn’t take away from the fluffy.  Especially since it went hand in hand with the belief that unicorns had magical powers of healing AND, get this, could be captured only by virgins.

What?  Was the virgin wearing a brand?  A t-shirt, maybe?

Oh, don’t even get me started.  As a liberated woman of the 21st century, the idea that a woman’s worth is wrapped up in the status of her vajayjay just makes me see red.

But I digress.

Fortunately for the unicorn, these ridiculous virgin myths aren’t the only ones.  In fact, the Chinese believed in a decidedly less fluffy version of the unicorn.

The Chinese unicorn, or k’i-lin, resembled a dragon more than it did a Western unicorn.  It is said that to see it brought luck.

In fact, after seeing one wander through the palace of Emperor Huang-ti, the emperor invented musical instruments.  Not only that, but he taught his people how to build brick houses and united the Chinese tribes.  And when he died, the k’i-lin reappeared to take him off to paradise.

Very noble indeed.  And yet there is still another side to the unicorn coin.  This is how explorer Marco Polo described them:

“Scarcely smaller than elephants. They have the hair of a buffalo and feet like an elephant’s. They have a single large black horn in the middle of the forehead. They have a head like a wild boar’s. They spend their time by preference wallowing in mud and slime. They are very ugly brutes to look at. They are not at all such as we describe them when we relate that they let themselves be captured by virgins, but clean contrary to our notions.”

Ew.

I guess my point is that like most things in mythology, a unicorn can be whatever you want it to be.  Strong and noble, wise and good, ugly and brutal, or even, dare I say, pink and fluffy and dancing on rainbows.

So, tell me, which unicorn do you prefer?

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8 thoughts on “Supernatural Saturday: Pink Fluffy Unicorns

  1. My favorite unicorn would be: powerfully-muscled, ebon-skinned, brilliant beyond human intelligence and wisdom and not controlled by the dictates of good or evil but rather by those of nature.

    Otherwise, I’m sticking with dragons 🙂

  2. This is so interesting! I feel all learned and stuff. The question I have about the “virgin” debate is are we talking the modern day “Christian” form of virgin i.e. non-broken hymen, or are we talking the ancient understanding of virgin? To the Greeks/Romans/crazy old civs, virgin meant an independent woman who was able to take care of herself. She could have all the bed skedaddles she wanted, because to keep that term “virgin” had nothing to do with her anatomy and everything to do with her attitude and way of life.

    That’s a REAL virgin. Pure of mind.

    And, I like fluffy things. You know this. I cannot lie.

  3. I never really thought of unicorns like this. I thought of them as kind creatures, despite the displaced medieval horn sticking out of their heads. But not… fluffy.
    My ideal unicorn would be… (I’ve never thought of this before by the way) black. Righteous. A heavy metal fan that wore a cape (one upping the Pegasus here). Kind of like a vigilante. He would absolutely have a spike on his head… but it would be retractable. By day he would seem to be just an ordinary horse.. geeky and uncoordinated. By night, a do-gooder protecting the innocents from evil.
    Hmm.. I think I just described the equestrian form of Superman.

  4. Awesome post.
    I don’t think you find much of unicorns in popular culture anymore. To be honest I hadn’t thought of them in ages and I was thinking of ogres last week, best not to ask.

    1. I remember when I was a kid they were all the rage. The Last Unicorn and My Little Pony probably had something to do with that. lol

      As far as I’m concerned it’s perfectly normal to be thinking about ogres. 🙂 lol

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